I wonder why the majority of my favorite bloggers are all taking time off from blogging right now. Is it because it's harder to lose weight during the Summer and they don't want to admit they aren't doing well? Is it because they are so busy and active that they don't have time to blog? I miss them. I draw inspiration from them. It's funny how I think I really "know" these people when I have never met them. I wonder what they are doing and how they are doing. Pretty random thought I know, but I've just been wondering what's been going on.

So, my trip was not the great success that I'd hoped it would be. However, I did realize that I have an addiction to sugar. It's gotten worse. I went to my BFF's house in PA and we ate a lot of junk. The "junk" that we ate was mostly desserts. As far as the meals go, they weren't totally bad. I managed to balance my foods pretty well it was the sugar that took me overboard. I've read before that eating sugar (and sugar substitutes) just makes you crave more sugar. I never sat down to think about it much, but this past week has made me take a look at what I've been doing.

In about 3 1/2 weeks I will get tested for gestational diabetes. I would like to pass the test, but there is a small part of me that wants to fail so I am forced to control myself. I listen to this podcast and the guy always says the doctor is the "motivator of last resort" and it's so true. If a doctor tells me that I have to control my sugar intake or give myself shots, I'll bet I will start controlling myself. How sad is that? I am a grown woman. I am capable of controlling myself now. Why don't I?

This week I will. My goal for the week is to only have one dessert at night after dinner if I want it. I've been snacking on sugary stuff all day long for weeks now. It's pretty mindless when I grab a cookie and eat it. I think I also have to (sigh.....) start writing down everything I eat. I have success when I do that and I have no idea why I just can't force myself to do it. I was doing pretty well on WW when I did it. Isn't that enough for me to do it again?

I will give myself credit for not giving up. I am constantly thinking about ways to get back on track and I am still working out. I got home on Tuesday and worked out twice at the gym this week. I think there are some women who might just give up until after they give birth. I refuse to do that. I will keep fighting to stay healthy until this baby is born and then get back to my regular "diet" after that. I refuse to give up. I just have to find what works for me now and do it consistently.

And for anyone who might be reading this that is also a blogger, I miss you. Please come back!