Happy 2018! Yes, I know I'm a month late, but better late then never!!
I don't think you know this but, I am going to turn 50 this year. This is a big deal to me. I've decided to make this year the best one yet, and so far I am off to a good start.
My frist "resolution" (I hate calling it that but it is the best word to describe it) is to find my joy again. I've been so sad since my friend died. I am not letting this year go by feeling the same way. I want to be happy again and I know it's a choice I have to make.
I do feel some guilt because trying to be happy and "moving on" is almost like saying I want to forget my friend. I will never forget her, but I have to try to move on and find my happiness. I have two kids and a husband who deserve a happy mom and wife. I'm not quite sure how to feel about the guilt, but I will work through it. I have to. I can't spend another year like I did last year, lost in grief and sadness.
My mantra for this year is going to be 50 by 50. I am going to lose 50 pounds by my 50th birthday. It is in September and if I lose 5.5 pounds a month, I will hit my goal. 5.5 a month sounds very doable doesn't it? Well, I can tell you that it isn't. I barely made my goal for January but I did it. I'm off to a good start for February but I have to work hard this month because it's my daughters birthday next week. Most people celebrate a day for a birthday, but in my family we do it up and stretch out the festivities. But, I can have fun without stuffing my face.
In January I just watched what I ate and worked out when I could. I have realized that I need more structure and I need to actually start following a plan. I think I have decided on the South Beach diet. For those of you that don't know what South Beach is, it's a low carb and low fat diet. I have done it before and know it works- if I do it. It won't be fun. I won't be able to eat what I want when I want, but my goal is more important then having a party in my mouth at each meal.
I refuse to go into my 50's the same way I went into my 40's. I vowed to get healthy and never did. I'm tired of wasting so much time hating my body. I know, I should just accept my body for how it is now, but I'm unhealthy and miserable. I am in pain and achy all the time. My feet hurt and I have aches and pains everyday. I know if I got healthy, I will feel better and I am taking this year and doing what I need to do for ME. If that means saying no to things so I can work out, I will do it. If it means saying no to eating out because I have a hard time staying on track when I go out eat, I will say no. Somethings gotta give and I can't keep doing what I've been doing and expect different results.
#50x50 baby!!!
