It's been a few weeks since I've written. I am happy to report that I have lost 31 pounds since I started. But boy this has been a hard journey. It's coming off much slower then it ever has and it just seems like every day is a struggle.
I saw my doctor last week for a physical and I found out that I am pre diabetic. If I was not on my weight loss journey already I would have been really bummed. But, since I've lost 31 pounds already I know I am well on my way to not being a diabetic. She told me the numbers were high last year (I don't know the technical terms for "the numbers"). I guess if you have high numbers you will be diabetic in 3-5 years. I am very thankful that i have time to correct this, but at the same time I think I've worked so hard to lose this weight that I should be healthy NOW!
I don't want to sound like Debbie Downer but I also made a goal for myself that I would be able to wear my wedding ring by Feb 9. I don't think I will hit that goal and I am so sad about that. I know I am doing well, and I will continue to do so, but I have set goals for myself that I won't hit and that makes me angry at myself.
I think what makes me sad is that fact that I'm getting older and what I used to be able to do to lose weight doesn't work as well now. I don't feel 47. I feel like I should be in my 30's. I'm trying to be thankful for everything I've done, but at the same time I'm mad that I can do the same things I used to be able to do and not get the same results.
My new goal is to be the in 220's next week. I have been working out A LOT more so I'm pretty confident I will hit it. Not, I'm not confident I am SURE I WILL hit my goal. Period.
I don't know when you started, but 31 lbs is awesome no matter what!
ReplyDeleteI totally get what you're saying about the health stuff. As I get older, it becomes more and more important. Like you, I used to wish that I could lose weight as easily as before. Now, I just hope that I learn what I need to learn to keep it off forever. I don't want to spend my life fixated on food - in either the binging or counting areas.
Unfortunately for me being a food addict I am afraid it will be a lifelong battle. I've been stalled now for 2 weeks and have lost a little motivation. My plan is to get back on track on Monday and I know I can do it, I'm just discouraged because i got off track. Good luck to you!
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